I Miss My Dad

Yesterday night I had to go to my brother's band concert and Sunhee and Christina played the song "Ashokan Farewell" as a solo. They did a great job. My dad loved that song. It got stuck in my head, and at the time they played it, it wasn't really bothering me but I just looked it up to listen to on youtube and I started crying. I miss him so much. So many things remind me of him. Like today in the auction there was a clear frosted glass chess set that I would have tried so hard to get for him because it would the perfect thing for a Christmas present. You see all over the year I see and find things and find out what people might like and now, having seen that, if he were still alive, even if I hadn't gotten it at the auction, I would have tried really hard to find another one to get him because that is a good gift idea for him. Now it feels like there's the perfect thing to get someone but they aren't here to recieve it. Another time was that in Humanities we had to do a Criterion essay and it was about how we had gotten stranded on an island. In my story I was all alone on the island and well, it really triggered emotion. Inside of me, and I didn't want to show it, I was really sad. I guess it was mainly because well, if you've ever heard of the movie 'Cast Away' it's about a guy who gets stranded on and island alone for like two years. Anyway I had watched that with my mom dad and brother and it made me cry so hard. When I was writing that essay it was in context of me the person stranded on an island reliving how I'd gotten there and how I was sad and all alone, I felt like I was reliving something that had actually happened to me while I was writing it. Thankfully at the end I had to rush to finnish so I was in a hurry and I could kind of forget how I felt. I'm so thankful to have you guys to let this stuff out to. It makes me feel so much better to try to explain this and figure out what I'm feeling.